I Do.... Do you??

Marriage traditions and customs differ greatly from culture to culture, but culture does not affect the feelings and sentiments attached to marriage. 

Every married couple has one thing in common, each partner is attached with a string called love. So feeling and sentiments between husband and wife aren't different from any other couple living in any part of the world, or belong to different religion or cast.....

October is a very exuberant time in India. 

After Navratri and Dussehra its Time to welcome the festival of love between a husband and wife, colours, joy, enthusiasm, family traditions, reunion of friends,  and not to forget festival of creativity for many companies trying hard to attract customers....;) 

A one-day festival in which married women fast from sunrise to moonrise, Karwa Chauth is few days away...

Don't worry  I am not going into much detail to explain how Karva Chauth originated and the religious logic behind it...:)

Born and married in a North Indian, punjabi family, karwa chauth is not new to me. I have seen my mother and grandmother celebrating it. Waking up even before sunrise, getting ready to eat sargi (sweets, dry fruits, fenia given by mother-in-law), applying henna on hands, dressing up in beautiful clothes, colourful bangles, going for Pooja with decorative thalis( plates), delicious meal at night...as a kid all this fascinated me but fast part, not eating and drinking whole day was too horrifying. 

I still get goosebumps thinking about my mom in Festive mood with 3 naughty kids dancing on her head asking for food, and other sweets....;) 

Yes, I too celebrate this festival.  Being married for 5 yrs this will be my 6th fast and let me tell you it's not an easy fast for a person like me,

* who loves to eat every now and then,

* Eats food kept in front without giving much thought.

* Get irritated when there is delay in meal, skipping a meal is a nightmare.

* eats when stressed.

* thinks saying no to home made, tempting and mouth watering food is an insult...

It's no joke...

I am tensed, nervous, excited,  happy...there is a mix of emotions. I have to mentally prepare myself for it.

You must be wondering, if it's so much fuss why do I keep fast. Well..

I don't feel ashamed in accepting at time of my marriage I was in a dilemma...to do or not to do?  Everybody around me seemed more excited.

First year of my fast, I was too naive. Without food and water I was one big volcano ready to erupt.

At night waiting for the moon I started an argument with my husband for not reciprocating the fast, and eating in front of me...and asked how my love is proved with grumbling stomach??

He just laughed and said you don't have to keep the fast, its your wish but don't ask me because I cannot afford it?( he is too thin and does not gain even a single pound even after having rice, paranthas, poori, and all kind of fried food) It will be you who will be in trouble afterwards...(married women can relate to it because every other relative comes up saying "Don't you give him anything to eat? He is getting weaker day by day.")...so keep me out of it....

His answer not only made me laugh but made me emotionally free, because only his opinion mattered most in this case.

I got full year, a big break to think rationally, and be more logical.

And then I was clear I won't do it just:

* to follow what others were doing,or be a part of some social group,

* or to keep my mother happy.(she would have made me feel guilty with her furious looks if I didn't.)

* or to prove that i am a sanskari bahu who  came straight out of a stupid daily soap on Television.

* or due to fear of some bad consequences that might occur.
* or to prove my love for my husband.

Now I fast, because I want to. I have my beliefs: have faith in God, I simply follow my heart. 

Love does not demands to be loved back. True love is selfless,  you don't expect anything,  you just want the person to be happy.

After so many years, The story behind fasting  is a little unclear to me, even after hearing different narrations of the tale. But, What I find interesting about this day is, its celebrated as Lord Shiva (God of destruction) Family worship day. Shiva’s wife, Goddess Parvati  is considered to be the symbol of eternal marital bliss. The wives invoke Parvati to bless them also the same marital bliss she herself enjoys.

At night moon is worshipped because moon is believed to be the god of medicines, it blesses ones with health and consequently gives long life. 

You may find me Orthodox, but this is completely my decision. Keeping the spirit of the festival intact I made changes to enjoy the day to the fullest, I eat what i want to in sargi, I don't overdress, or go for a gathering, or have appointment with saloon or wait in long queue for heena. I love it simple.

So In evening I worship Goddess Parvati and at moonrise I pray to God to bless my husband with health, wealth and happiness.

It's a time when we revive our vows, vows that we made at the time of our marriage. Vows that we neither said verbally nor will say aloud..ever..but still find ourselves committed to it. 

This is a day to Cherish the bond and memories spent together.

Fast or no fast....love remains same...

You do or don't its completely your take. No one has right to dictate it to you.

Question is not about fast but the feeling behind it. When you love someone,you try to go out of bounds to express your love, sacrifice anything to make your spouse happy because a single smile is worth millions.


What do you think... 

Do you agree.. Is it A festival worth celebrating.....

I Do.... Do you??